Cherish love and cherish friendship.
My adventure with C
There is a lot to tell about C.
I have done that, and I will continue to do that.
We were each other's love for a while, and I consider C to be a great love.
With her, I experienced the joy of women's love, and I dared to come out to my parents for the second time.
She accompanied me to my parents' parties and joined in their celebrations. We traveled together, and we had a job together.
No matter how beautiful our love was, it didn't end well.
We argued every day, and it was horrible and hideous. How could something so beautiful end so ugly?
Probably because we were always together, we couldn't live without each other, and we had grown so accustomed to each other's company that we continued to do so even when it was more than enough.
It was a painful time, and when I think about myself, I feel shame.
After we argued for a year and a half, C found love again in the arms of an American friend of mine, whom I had met in New York in 1980 and who came to tour Europe with an American all-girl punk band, The Bloods.
C and A were very much in love, or pretended to be. There was a wedding in Paradiso.
I was relieved. I was glad that my ex had found someone she loved.
C was a wild girl at the time, too wild for me.
Yet all this time, and that has been the case for almost half a century, I have continued to love and care about her.
In 1990, she returned to her native country. The Netherlands was not good for her. I'm not sure why that was the case. Too uprooted?
We kept in touch, I don't remember how, it was before that whole internet thing, so I think we sometimes called each other and sent cards or letters.
I knew about her love life and she knew about mine.
She met a fantastically nice girl whom she married here in Amsterdam in 2000. I was a witness to their marriage. That nice woman has also become very dear to me and this summer we are going to Lesbos, I am on a pilgrimage and they were already there.
Once every two weeks, C and I speak via WhatsApp. Those conversations are invaluable to me.
Now, after fifty years, C and I have reached a point where we discuss our relationship, and, very importantly for me, the women in our relationship. We never did that before, I don't know why, but I think we'll find out.
I am so happy with the friendship with C
Cherish love and cherish friendship.